6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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