Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
