Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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