So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Randomize
