I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
