this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Randomize
