My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Randomize
