lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I just projectile vomited in a Methodist church parking lot. If Jesus didn't love me before he sure as hell doesn't now.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
Randomize
