YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
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