Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
Randomize
