you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
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