Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Randomize
