i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
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