I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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