weddingsv make me drug and hornr
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
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