You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
