More tranny stories later!
I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
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