I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
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