My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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