I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
I'm gonna fight the coyote
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize
