he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
