we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Randomize
