i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
