Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
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