I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
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