Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Randomize
