we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
