There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
