I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Randomize
