Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Randomize
