Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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