Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
Randomize
