Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I cut my penus on the lid.
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
