I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Just high enough for therapy.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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