Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
I have feelings that need drinking.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Randomize
