Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Randomize
