I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
No I am not eating basil off your cock
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
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