she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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