You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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