But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
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