He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
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