I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
