i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
