some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
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