I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Randomize
