I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Randomize
