god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
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