ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Randomize
