I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
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