Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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